Here we are, once again marking Thanksgiving. Only last week did I realize that that this year marks the 400th anniversary of the founding of the colony at Plymouth. Four hundred years! We do not get to celebrate many quadricentennials here in the US. The Russians have plenty of them. So do the Brits, French, Italians, Spanish, Chinese, and many other nations around the globe. But not us.

There is no small irony in the fact that, in this historic year, officials are begging or commanding families to muzzle their Thanksgiving celebration, threatening punishments in some states. I will muzzle myself from writing more on this, except to say that the tradition of Thanksgiving is one of the brightest moments in our national story and needs to shine, particularly in a year when nearly every other celebration has been wiped out of people’s lives.

So celebrate we must and shall, whether that means a traditional family gathering, a day spent in volunteer work, or a feast staged in a creative manner to meet logistical constraints. The old saying “Where there’s a will, there’s a way” has been in high gear since March 2020, and I see no sign of that ingenuity waning.

Think, though, of people who have no one with whom to celebrate (in person or virtually). I am speaking not so much of the elderly who throughout time have faced the challenge of isolation. I am thinking of people, particularly young people, who feel themselves disconnected from the whole “Thanksgiving thing,” not valuing national traditions such as Thanksgiving, or taking pride in the story of our nation.

Recently I stumbled into Yoram Hazon’s interview of Mary Eberstadt (author of Home Alone America and many thought-provoking commentaries on today’s culture). In the interview, Eberstadt discussed concisely and with admirable authority the lawlessness that suddenly characterizes our American life. Her concern was not just the obvious danger per se but its nonchalant acceptance by large swaths of our populace.

Eberstadt posed this question: “Why are so many young Americans, in particular, desperate for collective political identities?” Others around the globe are asking the same question: “Have the Americans we’ve long admired for their individualism, grit, and problem-solving lost their way?”

Eberstadt attributed the cause to be the “tripartite collapse of the paternal principle.” This collapse, she explained, can overtake people who were raised devoid of an “earthly father” (their own fathers), a supernatural father (religious faith), and a “declining patriotism” (love of country). Taken together, the absence of these three “paternal” factors creates a vacuum that eviscerates the soul of a young, developing human being.

Another of her points had to do with the slipping away of once-ordinary methods of personal identity. For example, if asked “Who are you?” Eberstadt’s answer would include descriptors like wife, mom, sister, aunt, daughter, writer, member of such-and-such synagogue.

At first, though, I thought: “What an odd point she is making. Why would answering that question be difficult for someone?” It never would have been in the past. But at this point in our societal development, it has become difficult. Standard, positive, admirable roles are absent in some people’s lives. Many traditional roles have been debunked, others devalued, others mocked. And what replaces them?

Think how many young persons recoil from (or simply cannot) identify themselves as so-and-so’s daughter or son, particularly employing affectionate terms they would have heard growing up like “beloved son,” “the apple of mom’s eye,” or “always my father’s shadow.” Think of how many cohabitating couples exist wherein a woman, wistfully or not, has to identify herself as a fiancée, since marriage does not loom on her horizon. Or to use one of the most horrific of all examples, thing of a young woman being labeled “baby-momma”—a woman with a child whose father is, shall we say, not the “marrying kind.” Eberstadt is right: identity today has become a floating kaleidoscope of temporary labels that lead to untold personal sadness and an overall societal harm.

Humans flourish when their lives are supported by healthy paternal and maternal columns, no matter how loudly commentators, psychologists, politicians, academics, celebrities, or sports figures try to tear this fact down. Humans thrive when they know where they come from and where they are going. They thrive when they have a clear identity and can build upon it.

But looming ideologies of our time dangle new identities that primarily are destructive ones. In the details of these identities you will find little space for things like giving thanks, commemorating our forefathers, or nurturing traditions. As once ordinary actions break down, so too breaks down the substance of traditional identities such as mother, father, aunt, uncle, teacher, nurse, carpenter, salesman, engineer, or secretary.

Ah, there’s a good example. Was not this long-held, respected identity deemed anti-feminist sometime around the 1980s? It was replaced by vague titles like Administrative Assistant that claimed to confer more status. Status? Ha! Some of the most exciting, challenging work I ever did dates to periods when I worked as a secretary. “How is that?” a young person might ask. Well, anyone working in a dynamic company knows that no one has a better grasp or wields has more power than a trusted secretary!

But the most beleaguered identity today is that of a person of faith. Throughout her history, America was admired as a nation where religious faith could be practiced openly, enthusiastically, and without apology. Many eyes looking our way from around the globe sadly are wondering why we dropped the effort needed to keep that national heritage alive.

And what about researchers who delve into the facts of the original Thanksgiving in 1621 and debunk the “smiling Pilgrim lady holding the turkey platter”? Let them debunk her, and scoff if they wish. Our national tradition of expressing gratitude is far more powerful than the verifiable or unverifiable details of a long-ago event that gave birth to it.

Along the way, do not be put off by necessary human concepts such as paternal and maternal that have existed for millennia. Rather, let us celebrate them as strengths and work to bring them to all people, particularly those who have not had grown up soothed by their balm.

Celebrate the hard-fought identity of Thanksgiving and those people who labored to build a country that has been the envy of the world. Celebrate, give thanks, and cherish our traditional identities, including our identities of a nation (pater) of liberty, justice, and opportunity for all.